When a man dates the beauty of his dreams, she seems as though she can do no wrong. He looks forward to every time they will be together. Her every wish is his command. He loves doing nothing more than making her happy. And the feeling of a woman to her beau is just as reciprocal. Both seem so satisfied in doing nothing but what pleases the other.
Then comes marriage and several months’ later things seem to change. Both the husband and the wife get settled in to a new routine and see faults that were not evident before they were married. The problem is that these faults are not just noticed but they become outward criticisms. The love seems to fade and a mere existence is what takes its place. Criticism is like a cancer. The more it exists the deeper and more widespread its results.
There is a little devotional called Bits & Pieces, which has some really sound advice to living in harmony with other people, especially a spouse: “The only way to live happily with people is to overlook their faults and admire their virtues.” In other words, focus on their positive attributes vice their negative attributes.
The Bible gives some good advice on this topic. It tells husbands “to love their own wives” (Eph. 5:28) and it tells the wife to “respect her husband” (Eph. 5:33). What seems to be the problem is that neither the wife nor the husband wants to 100% carry out these verses until the other responds first. There is an impasse. The only way around this is for the husband and the wife to put Christian love back into their relationship. This means that both must start living 1 Cor. 13:4-7, “Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag, and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” Yep, I agree with you; living that is virtually impossible. That is if you live it according to your natural, fleshly abilities. Living those verses can only come when you yield yourself to the power of the Holy Spirit who lives within you.
Let every married couple renew their commitment to their spouse. It takes a supernatural spark and a personal commitment to make it work!! The result is marital bliss!!
